A thought on weird feedback...

---> and what to do with it

As someone who used to be a pretty obsessed hobby magician, I’m still subscribed to emails from a lot of magic shops and publishers.

I got one in my inbox today promoting a new book about “the controlled coin toss”. In other words learning how to toss a coin so it comes down on the side you want.

Frankly, a pretty amazing skill. And at 152 pages the book obviously goes into some detail teaching that skill.

I went to the website of the book, read the description, watched the video.

Then I scrolled to the bottom of the page to see what questions other magicians had asked. Perhaps about how long it took to master the skill. Whether it worked with any coins.

Nope.

The solitary question was “Is the book's binding sewn? Or glued? Thanks.”

I can imagine the reaction of the poor author of the book having poured thousands upon thousands of hours into perfecting the skill then painstakingly documenting it. Only to find out what was really important to potential customers was the stitching on the book.

But, of course, that’s not really the case.

For some reason, it’s always the weirdest people who respond the most actively.

And that’s as true of your emails as it is for the poor guy who’s written the definitive tome on the controlled coin toss.

Whenever you write to a non-tiny audience you’re bound to accidentally hit someone’s hot button.

I’ve upset people with my emails for suggesting that some coaches might be a teensy bit annoying at times. Or just for using the word “terrible”.

And the less bland your emails are - which is obviously a good thing - the more likely it is you’ll annoy someone at some point.

Inevitably they’ll write to you.

And if you’re human, you’ll feel bad that you’ve upset them. Or maybe angry if you feel they’re being unreasonable.

You can’t let it get to you.

I used to.

I’d mull over it for hours. I’d email back trying to explain why they were mistaken.

It never got me anywhere.

I’ve seen some email marketing experts recommend “trolling” people who complain by ridiculing them in follow-up emails.

I guess that might make them feel better. For me, that’s pure playground bullying and I certainly wouldn’t recommend it.

These days what works for me is raising an eyebrow and marvelling at the diversity of human opinion. Then getting on with life.

I still feel a bit bad if someone takes offence at something I say. I still get a bit defensive if someone complains.

But it doesn’t really get to me.

I hope the controlled coin toss expert feels the same about the guy asking about the stitching on his book.

- Ian